Bella had no idea what time meant. She had never known how old she was or what date, month or year it was. It seemed odd to those who knew her. It was not that she was lost. She wasn’t lost at all. Just that she had come to a conclusion that time is immaterial. It never bothered her to know, and she quickly forgot when was it exactly that she was.
What people found queer, Bella felt was her way of life. She did not mind people telling her over and over again that she should keep a track of time. People seemed to believe that there was no way one can survive without knowing what time it was. Once the more famous forms of tortures, they said, discovered by men was isolating the candidate and putting him in a room with no windows. Men went crazy without knowing the date or even if its day or night.
The calm and composure of Bella, even as she had no track of time perturbed the people who knew her. Ironically, a lot of them went crazy attempting to ‘fix’ her. Her composure also lent her an air of mystery and no one could comprehend her agnosticism towards knowledge of time.
There was only one old and haggard woman who knew why Bella was the way she was. Bella had come across her several times but she didn't remember that either. Who was this strange lady? She was always around, lurking in shady streets, shady corners of the city, hiding herself from people, who had loathed her forever now. They ignored her and wanted never to look at her and had shunned her to the ruins of the city where she roamed alone. No one to talk to, no one to share with. It had been ages since she had been there, forgotten by all. Generation after generation of men had let her be, and gradually her tale became a myth. She was lost forever. Well, maybe not forever.
It was October, 1965. Bella did not remember this date either. She had started losing track of time then. She had been happy once. Happier than she’d ever known anyone to be. She had loved Kaspy once with all her mind, heart and soul. He was the love of her life, all that she lived for. All that she thought of. She had made sacrifices that seemed to her the most natural thing to do. People were shocked at her decisions. “You are throwing away your whole life’s hard work”, they used to say. “My whole life’s hard work got me to Kaspy. He is the reward of everything I’ve done. Now I want to cherish it. Tell me what’s wrong with that.” She did. Till 2011. She was 70.
I am no one to judge whether the sacrifices were right or wrong. However, she did make a mistake. She should not have loved so much. The ingrate Kaspy just left one day. He was a human being after all. On his way home from the book store, he met the old hag. They had a brief word, and he left with her. Never coming home. Never telling Bella what had happened. He was gone.
He was gone. The void in her life, was much more than what Bella could take. She had no idea where Kaspy was and she was determined to find him. She walked the streets of the city in despair – yet determined to find Kaspy...
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Friday, October 14, 2011
Love's labor costs...
Its time to begin another chapter, another story on this dead-for-a-month-and-a-half blog. I am answerable to the writer in me who thinks job is not a good enough reason for not writing anymore. I am anawerable to my sister who got me this android phone, perhaps only for this. I am answerable to my love, who has been searching for kasper for 4 months now.
My next story, which will be in 2 parts, will be posted here soon. I'll write the first and rigveda kadam will write the second. I am dedicating my half to her, and my sister. And of course to the quest of love in a romantic. Stay tuned for the first part.. coming up later tonight.
My next story, which will be in 2 parts, will be posted here soon. I'll write the first and rigveda kadam will write the second. I am dedicating my half to her, and my sister. And of course to the quest of love in a romantic. Stay tuned for the first part.. coming up later tonight.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
The Quest Of The Sparrows
Hi All,
My first book - The Quest of the Sparrows: Explore the Joy of Freedom - is out!!! It has been published by Rupa Publications.
About the book:
It is the story of a reluctant young engineer who is forced to become a guru due to his circumstances. He takes inspiration from the life of a sparrow which though being frail in nature, never hoards for the future and lives every day of its life joyously. In http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifcomplete contrast, human beings, despite being placed on top of the evolution ladder have flooded their lives with worries. In their anxiety http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifto secure their future, they have reduced their lives to mediocrity and given up their quest of evolving themselves. The result is that their lives are no more significant than that of a sparrow: an irony.
It is a fast paced, easy to read book of fiction in which the message is imbibed in the experiences of the characters in the story.
Here is the link to the wiki page of the book: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Quest_of_the_Sparrows
and my website: Kartik Sharma
Enjoy Reading. Happy Evolution.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
A Promise, To Die For
A story of death rests in my drawer in the office. Another story, of death, goes on the blog. Some call me morbid. Not too wrong, are they?
3 AM:
He had the gun pointed to his head. Not in the way they show it in the movies. You know, with the barrel pointed at the temple. He was staring down the barrel. Waiting for death to lunge out from in there any moment. His brain was in a serious discussion with his index finger which, for now, was ambling around the trigger, carelessly, waiting for inspiration. As he had. For most of his life.
This part of his life, not surprisingly, is called 'The Inspiration'.
He wanted to end the grind. The relentless pain and misery. Or maybe he just got bored? Na. He had a good life, which flashed before his eyes. Not like they say in the movies. He was trying his best to make some sense out of it.
He looked around his apartment at the pictures of all the people he loved. And those who had loved him. He was supposed to feel an obligation towards them that he did not feel. No matter how hard he tried.
"Why?" he wondered. "Why is it so easy to be selfish?"
"It's not. You are doing all of them a favor. Trust me." There was another voice inside him. He hadn't listened to it so far, and now it was bursting out of him. His mind, had suppressed it up until now. No more. No more.
"What do you worry about? The pain you'll cause them? Let me give you some perspective - there is no such thing as a lasting sense of loss. You have lost loved ones, haven't you? How much do you think about them now? It seemed like you'll never get over the grief at the time. Look at you now. Life goes on, buddy."
He listened intently to the voice and was trying to find arguments, but he found his finger moving on to the trigger now. He found his hand firming its grip around the revolver.
"There is salvation waiting at the end of that tunnel. Its coming for you. Freedom - of heart and mind. You are your own God at this time."
The thought, now lodged in his mind gave him a sense of power. His arrogance, now assuaged, accepted the fact rather easily. It was so easily to fool him. Well, who has been served well by arrogance, ever!
"Allow yourself the gift. You deserve it. You have been a good son, husband and father."
"I have been. Haven't I? I have worked so hard for 25 years of my life to provide for my family and my loved ones. They can do without me. They need me out of their lives now."
He had worked his way into the best engineering schools in the country and then to the best business schools. He had slogged the best years of his life in a top-notch job that he loved so much. And he had provided well for them. Assuming that they needed him to provide for them. Assumption. He believed the arrogance was an 'occupational perk'. He could easily afford it.
"That is the only way they'll be free. This is the only way to unlock the true happiness for them."
"What have I become?" he asked.
"It is your duty to set your spirit free. You have suppressed it long enough. Fulfill your duty to your spirit."
There was a smile on his face. The fingers, which were not paying any heed to his mind until now, suddenly seemed to looked at him questioningly. He nodded, slowly.
FLASH!
He woke up the next morning, a new man. A part of him that had outlived its importance, and needed to go had died. He had promised himself that he will pursue his dreams. He wanted to read, write, travel and experience things.
Guess what. He did exactly that.
Yet another, true story.
3 AM:
He had the gun pointed to his head. Not in the way they show it in the movies. You know, with the barrel pointed at the temple. He was staring down the barrel. Waiting for death to lunge out from in there any moment. His brain was in a serious discussion with his index finger which, for now, was ambling around the trigger, carelessly, waiting for inspiration. As he had. For most of his life.
This part of his life, not surprisingly, is called 'The Inspiration'.
He wanted to end the grind. The relentless pain and misery. Or maybe he just got bored? Na. He had a good life, which flashed before his eyes. Not like they say in the movies. He was trying his best to make some sense out of it.
He looked around his apartment at the pictures of all the people he loved. And those who had loved him. He was supposed to feel an obligation towards them that he did not feel. No matter how hard he tried.
"Why?" he wondered. "Why is it so easy to be selfish?"
"It's not. You are doing all of them a favor. Trust me." There was another voice inside him. He hadn't listened to it so far, and now it was bursting out of him. His mind, had suppressed it up until now. No more. No more.
"What do you worry about? The pain you'll cause them? Let me give you some perspective - there is no such thing as a lasting sense of loss. You have lost loved ones, haven't you? How much do you think about them now? It seemed like you'll never get over the grief at the time. Look at you now. Life goes on, buddy."
He listened intently to the voice and was trying to find arguments, but he found his finger moving on to the trigger now. He found his hand firming its grip around the revolver.
"There is salvation waiting at the end of that tunnel. Its coming for you. Freedom - of heart and mind. You are your own God at this time."
The thought, now lodged in his mind gave him a sense of power. His arrogance, now assuaged, accepted the fact rather easily. It was so easily to fool him. Well, who has been served well by arrogance, ever!
"Allow yourself the gift. You deserve it. You have been a good son, husband and father."
"I have been. Haven't I? I have worked so hard for 25 years of my life to provide for my family and my loved ones. They can do without me. They need me out of their lives now."
He had worked his way into the best engineering schools in the country and then to the best business schools. He had slogged the best years of his life in a top-notch job that he loved so much. And he had provided well for them. Assuming that they needed him to provide for them. Assumption. He believed the arrogance was an 'occupational perk'. He could easily afford it.
"That is the only way they'll be free. This is the only way to unlock the true happiness for them."
"What have I become?" he asked.
"It is your duty to set your spirit free. You have suppressed it long enough. Fulfill your duty to your spirit."
There was a smile on his face. The fingers, which were not paying any heed to his mind until now, suddenly seemed to looked at him questioningly. He nodded, slowly.
FLASH!
He woke up the next morning, a new man. A part of him that had outlived its importance, and needed to go had died. He had promised himself that he will pursue his dreams. He wanted to read, write, travel and experience things.
Guess what. He did exactly that.
Yet another, true story.
Monday, July 18, 2011
New York
When I started this blog, I promised myself that I will make at least a post a month. I have skipped the last two months, and it breaks my heart. My job does not allow me time enough to write even one post a month and that is, according to me the biggest downside of the job.
I actually happen to like the work and of late - I am loving the job a lot because I have a little over 30 days in New York City. On my own, I would never have travelled to US. I got nothing against the country, but I love Europe.
New York. The first foreign location that I have seen teeming with masses. It is almost as densely populated as Chandini Chowk in Dilli. So I don't think I am missing much, my homeland wise. Only the people. Only the ones I love.
1 month is not too and there is too much to do here and that keeps me occupied. I have seen the times square - both during the day and at night. I can see it from my hotel room window. Apparently, I got a good view. Apparently.
The city has no charm for me. The high rise buildings - the Manhattan skyline - there is nothing to it that allures me. Man made ugliness, I call it. I love the open, quite places and the European-esque places. And I found such a place here as well yesterday. South Port. I took a ferry ride through the silence of the Hudson River with engines grunting away above me - on the Manhattan and Brooklyn bridges and all around me in the land. I could not be more removed from all the noise and experienced peace for the first time in 2 days that I have been here.
There is a gigantic St. Patrick's church quite close by and that is next on my places to visit as soon as possible. I have been told it is amazing to take a walk on the Brooklyn bridge, so that is also on the cards.
The people I am interacting with are from all over the globe. Would like to meet the New Yorkers a little more to learn more about them.. but there is time for that. It is inevitable.
This was just a catch-up post with my favourite me-place.
I actually happen to like the work and of late - I am loving the job a lot because I have a little over 30 days in New York City. On my own, I would never have travelled to US. I got nothing against the country, but I love Europe.
New York. The first foreign location that I have seen teeming with masses. It is almost as densely populated as Chandini Chowk in Dilli. So I don't think I am missing much, my homeland wise. Only the people. Only the ones I love.
1 month is not too and there is too much to do here and that keeps me occupied. I have seen the times square - both during the day and at night. I can see it from my hotel room window. Apparently, I got a good view. Apparently.
The city has no charm for me. The high rise buildings - the Manhattan skyline - there is nothing to it that allures me. Man made ugliness, I call it. I love the open, quite places and the European-esque places. And I found such a place here as well yesterday. South Port. I took a ferry ride through the silence of the Hudson River with engines grunting away above me - on the Manhattan and Brooklyn bridges and all around me in the land. I could not be more removed from all the noise and experienced peace for the first time in 2 days that I have been here.
There is a gigantic St. Patrick's church quite close by and that is next on my places to visit as soon as possible. I have been told it is amazing to take a walk on the Brooklyn bridge, so that is also on the cards.
The people I am interacting with are from all over the globe. Would like to meet the New Yorkers a little more to learn more about them.. but there is time for that. It is inevitable.
This was just a catch-up post with my favourite me-place.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Of Heart and Mind
Tired and fatigued by all the ramblings of his sundry heart, no one to share them with and feeling after a very long the inadequacy of his mind, Kasper decided to pen his thoughts into the pensieve that this blog seems to have become.
Men are organizations. And like each organization, each Man has many departments for different purposes. This is a story about two of the most critical departments in Men. The department of Heart, which is also sometimes called Instinct or Subconscious depending which school of thought did the Man in question attend. This department is the first point of interpretation of external events and how they affect the Man. Another important department is the department of execution - Mind.
This is story of a particular Man who was known among other Men as Neo.
Heart is a keeper of so many feeling and emotions. There are processes at work there that even the smartest in Mind are unable to decipher. So it is the prerogative of the employees at the Heart to articulate some of the emotional jargon into a language that the employees at the Mind can understand. The honest and sometimes gullible employees at Heart, who know no deceit nor treachery tell the Mind people these secrets with a faith that they (the Mind people) can process them further. Oh, so naive can the Heart employees be sometimes.
Men at the Mind, though lagging the men at the Heart in terms of understanding and processing have a need to establish superiority in all matters. Even those that are under the purview of the heart. A Man finds it impossible to 'move a muscle' until the men at Mind allow. And this control over the physical manifestation of Man has deluded the Mind people to a degree that they are convinced of their superiority in the system.
The heart people are a frustrated lot at times. Though smarter and more capable than their peers at the department of Mind, their strengths are rendered useless because the processes at the Man require them to run all their observations through the mind. And the low processing ability and inefficiency of the men at Mind, causes a lot of data loss and huge lag in their understanding, interpreting the situation, planning the course of action and execution.
This domination of the department of Men has continued for ages and has become the norm. Until one organization decided to challenge this way of running things.
***
Of Heart and Mind
Kasper | Daily Fiction Chronicle
Wednesday, 20th April: At a board meeting at Neo yesterday in a move that dares to challenge the norms and the way the things are run at Men, it was decided to hand over the reigns of the organization to the department of Heart. The move is done with an expectation to make the system much more efficient. In doing so, Neo's CEO decided that it was best that the department of Heart function independently and need not explain all the observations to the department of Mind. It is believed that this move will not only save a lot of time required to translate the emotional jargon into mental jargon, but also speed up the planning the actions required and execution. The department of mind has been asked to only aid the department of Heart to the best of its ability and ensure that any of its interference in the matters of Heart should not create turbulence or dampen the streamlined processes at Heart.
The CEO believes that the Neo can now achieve the heights it deserves if this move works out. It has in a way stopped belonging to what has conventionally been understood as Men. If successful the organization’s move might usher an age of Neo-Men. It seems as of now that Neo is ready to take flight.
Men are organizations. And like each organization, each Man has many departments for different purposes. This is a story about two of the most critical departments in Men. The department of Heart, which is also sometimes called Instinct or Subconscious depending which school of thought did the Man in question attend. This department is the first point of interpretation of external events and how they affect the Man. Another important department is the department of execution - Mind.
This is story of a particular Man who was known among other Men as Neo.
Heart is a keeper of so many feeling and emotions. There are processes at work there that even the smartest in Mind are unable to decipher. So it is the prerogative of the employees at the Heart to articulate some of the emotional jargon into a language that the employees at the Mind can understand. The honest and sometimes gullible employees at Heart, who know no deceit nor treachery tell the Mind people these secrets with a faith that they (the Mind people) can process them further. Oh, so naive can the Heart employees be sometimes.
Men at the Mind, though lagging the men at the Heart in terms of understanding and processing have a need to establish superiority in all matters. Even those that are under the purview of the heart. A Man finds it impossible to 'move a muscle' until the men at Mind allow. And this control over the physical manifestation of Man has deluded the Mind people to a degree that they are convinced of their superiority in the system.
The heart people are a frustrated lot at times. Though smarter and more capable than their peers at the department of Mind, their strengths are rendered useless because the processes at the Man require them to run all their observations through the mind. And the low processing ability and inefficiency of the men at Mind, causes a lot of data loss and huge lag in their understanding, interpreting the situation, planning the course of action and execution.
This domination of the department of Men has continued for ages and has become the norm. Until one organization decided to challenge this way of running things.
***
Of Heart and Mind
Kasper | Daily Fiction Chronicle
Wednesday, 20th April: At a board meeting at Neo yesterday in a move that dares to challenge the norms and the way the things are run at Men, it was decided to hand over the reigns of the organization to the department of Heart. The move is done with an expectation to make the system much more efficient. In doing so, Neo's CEO decided that it was best that the department of Heart function independently and need not explain all the observations to the department of Mind. It is believed that this move will not only save a lot of time required to translate the emotional jargon into mental jargon, but also speed up the planning the actions required and execution. The department of mind has been asked to only aid the department of Heart to the best of its ability and ensure that any of its interference in the matters of Heart should not create turbulence or dampen the streamlined processes at Heart.
The CEO believes that the Neo can now achieve the heights it deserves if this move works out. It has in a way stopped belonging to what has conventionally been understood as Men. If successful the organization’s move might usher an age of Neo-Men. It seems as of now that Neo is ready to take flight.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Every Brick Tells a Story
Every brick tells a story, and that is all that I've heard growing up for the last two years. Some bitter, some sweet. Some tragic, some that will always make me nostalgic. Some that devour my soul, some that I'll savor forever. It was all here, all in the stories that the red bricks told me.
As I spoke to the last brick today, I said, "It's sad that I will never speak to you guys again and sadder still I'll not have more stories to hear." The long face and the last rays of the dying light of hope in the eyes said it all.
The ruthless brick replied, "But honey, it was always a two year thing. That is what we had decided." And it broke my heart.
Thinking about those last words now, I have arrived at a conclusion that it was not ruthless on the part of the brick. It has to keep telling it's stories to the new people that come with eager ears. That is what keeps it alive. And life, as they say, has to go on.
This last brick, has the toughest job. Some people tell it that they are glad and were sick to death with all the stories, and some others cry their heart out on its shoulder. There are some like me that are the hardest for the brick, with the hope dying in the eyes, eager to hear some good news and a twist in the tale. The brick has the responsibility to shake us up and bring us to reality. It is indeed a tough job.
I wish to thank all the red bricks for their stories that would help in ways more profound that my little head with all its limited imagination can fathom. It was a beautiful sojourn of two years and the stories, I will cherish for the rest of my life.
As I spoke to the last brick today, I said, "It's sad that I will never speak to you guys again and sadder still I'll not have more stories to hear." The long face and the last rays of the dying light of hope in the eyes said it all.
The ruthless brick replied, "But honey, it was always a two year thing. That is what we had decided." And it broke my heart.
Thinking about those last words now, I have arrived at a conclusion that it was not ruthless on the part of the brick. It has to keep telling it's stories to the new people that come with eager ears. That is what keeps it alive. And life, as they say, has to go on.
This last brick, has the toughest job. Some people tell it that they are glad and were sick to death with all the stories, and some others cry their heart out on its shoulder. There are some like me that are the hardest for the brick, with the hope dying in the eyes, eager to hear some good news and a twist in the tale. The brick has the responsibility to shake us up and bring us to reality. It is indeed a tough job.
I wish to thank all the red bricks for their stories that would help in ways more profound that my little head with all its limited imagination can fathom. It was a beautiful sojourn of two years and the stories, I will cherish for the rest of my life.
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